


Hold On Hope

by lindsaylaurie



Category: Agent Carter (TV)
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Multi, Polyamory, polyamory eventually
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-22
Updated: 2016-03-08
Packaged: 2018-05-22 13:11:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6080652
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lindsaylaurie/pseuds/lindsaylaurie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Ana is shot, Peggy finds herself closer to the Jarvises than ever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this because FEELINGS about Peggy and Jarvis holding hands at the end of the latest episode and then I had an idea on how to turn it into polyamory so here we go. Hopefully I can get this done before the next episode totally ruins it??

It's nearly midnight when Peggy takes Jarvis' hand in that cold hospital waiting room. It's all she can do for him now.

He won't look at her. She follows the line of his eyes to a clock with a small, red hand that is ticking far too slowly for Peggy's liking.

She knows all too well how Jarvis is feeling and wills herself not to draw comparisons, but she can't help it. Not knowing is the hardest part. She remembers sitting in the damn control room, feeling utterly powerless as Steve flew that plane. She didn't know, not until the final minutes, that it would be the last time she ever spoke to him. Now she can't bare to think that the same has happened to Jarvis, that he has spoken to Ana for the last time.

Peggy squeezes his hand. He tilts his head slightly to look at her. There are already bags under his red-rimmed eyes. She hates to see him like this, so despondent. Peggy wants to say something, wants to tell him she understands completely, but her tongue feels too heavy, her throat too tight.

Jarvis takes a deep, shuddering breath and closes his eyes. “You should get some sleep,” Peggy says. “I'll wake you the moment a doctor arrives.”

He shakes his head, eyes still closed. “I'm alright. You can sleep, if you wish, Ms. Carter.”

“Who's going to keep an eye on you if I sleep?” The lightness in her tone falls flat. She sighs and leans back into her uncomfortable chair.

Jarvis doesn't answer. His eyes are still closed but his uneven breathing tells her he's awake.

Her eyes shift back to the wall and her mind wanders. She still can't believe that idiot police officer opened the trunk when she expressly told him not to. Just when Peggy thought she'd gotten one thing under control, Dottie had escaped right out from under her. And now she's stuck in a hospital because she can't leave her friend. Even if every damn soviet spy in the world were loose in California, she wouldn't leave Jarvis now.

Peggy watches an hour pass second by second. Jarvis doesn't sleep. It's nearly two in the morning and Peggy can feel the fatigue clawing away at her mind, begging her to just close her eyes for a second. But she will not. Some part of her feels personally responsible for this. She is actually wholly responsible for this.

She was the one who released Dottie. She was the one who knowingly walked into a trap. At the time she thought knowing it was a trap gave her the power. But she had it all wrong and now Anna is in the hospital, Dottie is on the loose, and Jason is gone.

She tenses thinking about Jason. That's another thing she's going to have to deal with later. Whitney didn't kill him straight away. She has a plan for him, hopefully a plan that keeps him alive until Peggy can rescue him.

Unless she mucks that up too.

Her throat constricts and she squeezes her eyes shut. Two in the morning is a bad time for self-loathing. But she feels as if everything is crashing down around her. Once she had thought things were finally going smoothly, but that moment of reprieve is gone now.

Peggy rests her head against Jarvis' shoulder and he leans into her touch. He releases her hand and instead winds his arm around her shoulders to draw her in close. Peggy feels like weeping into his jacket. But she bites her tongue hard, wills her eyes to stay dry. Jarvis does not need her self-pity.

 

Someone clears their throat and it startles Peggy. She lifts her head blearily and sits up, cursing herself for falling asleep. A doctor stands before them, serious with splotches of grey hair and glasses. Peggy can't read his face. She supposes that's a good skill for a doctor to possess.

“Mr. Jarvis?”

Jarvis nods anxiously next to her. He takes her hand and squeezes too tightly.

“The surgery was a success but she's still not out of the woods. There was a lot of internal bleeding and organ damage, so we're still being cautious as this stage.”

“Can I see her?” Jarvis' voice is tight.

“They're taking her down from the OR just now. I'll have a nurse collect you when she's ready.”

The pressure on Peggy's hand releases slightly. Jarvis has gone silent again, so Peggy says, “Thank you, Doctor.”

The doctor gives her a grim nod and leaves. The room is quiet long moment before Jarvis falls against her. Peggy leans over, twists her body around to pull him into her arms. His face presses into her neck and his shoulders shake. She can feel the tears dripping onto her skin and again wills herself not to cry. She sucks her lip, she breathes through her teeth, but in the end she succumbs.

But she feels better after, when the nurse comes in and they break apart. She pulls a handkerchief from her pocket and dabs at her eyes as Jarvis gets to his feet. He looks back at her expectantly.

Peggy gets up slowly and smooths out her blouse. Together, she and Jarvis follow the nurse down the hall, past rows of doors on both sides. They stop outside a door at the end of the hall. The nurse opens it for them and Peggy lets Jarvis go first.

There's Ana, laid out in bed with a tube running up her nose and an IV in her arm. Her hair is splayed out over the pillow and her face is deathly pale but somehow she still manages to look beautiful.

And Jarvis is silent.

Peggy stands back, let's Jarvis have his time with his wife. His hands are balled into fists and she can see his shoulders start to shake. She gives him a moment longer before she steps up next to him and lays a hand on his shoulder.

“I'll kill her.” It's a fact. There is a venom behind the words that surprises Peggy. “She will regret what she’s done.”

Peggy swipes her thumb up and down Jarvis' shoulder in a comforting manner. She wants to tell him not to worry, that they will most definitely bring Whitney Frost to justice, but she is uncertain. With the way everything is going, she honestly can't see how any of this is going to be resolved.

So she holds his hand. It's the only thing she can do.


	2. Chapter 2

Peggy gets the call while she's picking up a change of clothes for Jarvis.

Ana is awake and Jarvis sounds so much better, so much more alive than he has in the last few hours. The hard knot loosens in Peggy's chest. One less thing for her to worry about. One less thing to feel guilty about.

When Peggy arrives at hospital, the mood of the room is far lighter than it had been hours earlier. Jarvis is at ease and Ana... Ana's eyes are open and her face doesn't have that deathly pallor. She grins at Peggy and her eyes are so full of life, full of that mischief that Peggy has come to cherish.

“Don't look so surprised, Ms. Carter,” Ana says as she beckons Peggy closer. “Did you think I was done for?”

Peggy laughs in spite of herself as she moves into the room. “I'll admit you did have me worried for a moment.”

Ana shakes her off with a wave of her hand. “I think you should be more worried about Mr. Jarvis.” She pats his arm fondly. “I don't think he's slept a wink.”

Jarvis shrugs and gives a half smile. “I'm alright. Or will be once I've had some tea.”

But there's something in his expression, something distant that Peggy can't read. She hopes all it will take to rid him of that look is some tea. “Check your jacket pocket,” she says as she hands Jarvis the bag containing his clothes where she's carefully tucked a few teabags into his pocket.

“Thank you, Ms. Carter.” Jarvis' smile widens and for a moment the threads in Peggy's chest come undone entirely. She's missed his smile. “I won't be a moment. Would you be so kind as to look after my wife?”

Ana rolls her eyes good naturedly. “Honestly, dear, stop fussing. I'm alright.”

There are hundreds of capable doctors and nurses in the hospital but the person Jarvis trusts with his wife is Peggy. Peggy who is the reason his wife was shot in the first place. The thought knots up her chest all over again. “It's no trouble.”

“Excellent.” Jarvis leans down to give Ana a quick kiss, but she doesn't let him off so easily. She slips her hand behind his head and pulls him down longer, so long that Peggy looks away and Jarvis clears his throat, embarrassed, when they part.

“Right then, I'll be going,” he mutters. His face is slightly flushed and his eyebrows are knitted together as he shuffles from the room.

“Always shy, that one,” Ana says fondly once he's left.

Peggy smiles as she pulls up a chair to the bed. “We're English. We're not so keen on showing our affections in public.”

“Public? This is hardly public! You're like family, Ms. Carter.” Ana reaches out to pat Peggy's arm. “Thank you for staying. Edwin worries so.”

“It's understandable.” Peggy keeps her tone light. It's hard not to with Ana's infectious attitude. “You have, after all, just been shot.”

Ana laughs. It's so easy to see why Jarvis loves her when she laughs. But she sobers up quickly with a seriousness in her eyes that makes Peggy pay attention. “You'll watch out for him, won't you Ms. Carter?” Ana takes her hand, squeezes it gently.

In return, Peggy is just as serious. “Of course, always.” She means it with everything she has.

“There's something he's not telling me.” Ana is speaking quickly, trying to get it out before Jarvis comes back. “I fear he's going to do something foolish.”

“He's not going to leave your side,” Peggy assures her. “Whatever's going to happen next, I'll take care of, alright? Mr. Jarvis' role is done for now.”

This time when Ana smiles, it's a bit sadly. “Even if that is the case, if Edwin doesn't do something foolish, what about you? Please take care of yourself. Edwin would be devastated if anything were to happen to you.”

Their hands are still intertwined. Ana's skin is warm and soft and her fingers are curled delicately around Peggy's.

“And I know I would be too.”

Peggy's breath catches in her throat as she finds herself frozen in the gaze of her best friend's wife. She catches her lip between her teeth, wills herself to look away, but Ana's lips are very slightly parted and her eyes have gone half lidded. Even though she knows she shouldn't, Peggy finds herself leaning forward. Close, too close.

Someone clears their throat and Peggy jerks back, face flushed. Standing at the door is Mr. Jarvis with fresh clothes and a paper cup of tea. He looks as embarrassed as Peggy feels.

“Oh, Edwin!” Ana titters, totally and completely immune to the mortification of the other people in the room. “You're looking much better, darling.”

“I—er, thank you.” Jarvis looks from Peggy to Ana and Peggy is very aware that Ana has not yet released her hand. She feels so shameful, as if somehow she has betrayed Jarvis, even though nothing happened. But something almost did. She almost kissed his beloved wife who is still recovering from surgery.

Curiously, when Peggy's eyes meet Jarvis', that's not the expression she finds. He's not betrayed or wounded. He's wearing the same expression as he had been when Ana kissed him earlier. Eyebrows knitted, face flushed.

“Well, I should be going then,” Peggy says, but as she tries to release Ana's hand, she holds fast.

“Lovely to see you, Ms. Carter,” Ana says, drawing Peggy's hand up to her mouth, much to Peggy's horror. Jarvis is standing right there, in the doorway. “Do be careful, please.” Ana's lips brush her fingers gently before she finally released

It was a purely platonic gesture, Peggy tells herself as she leaves the hospital. All of the signals she's been getting from Ana are purely platonic. If they weren't, she wouldn't do them in front of her _husband._

Her husband whom Peggy has been particularly close with, especially as of late...

Peggy Carter thinks she might be the worst friend in recorded history.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter will be written after the finale, no matter who dies. :P


	3. Chapter 3

 

Too much has happened. Peggy just wants to go home and lie in bed for a week straight. But she knows she can't. As soon as she gets home it's right back to work. Her vacation time is over.

After she says her goodbyes to Jason and Howard, she gathers up her things and calls for a cab. Jarvis is at the hospital collecting Ana. She doesn't want to ask him to take her to the airport, to steal away more time with his wife. But that means she needs to leave before he returns. That means not saying goodbye.

It's rude, she knows, but as she stands outside of the estate, waiting for a cab, bouncing on her heels, she knows it's the right choice. She needs time away from the Jarvises, no matter how much she doesn't want it. Even though things between her and Mr. Jarvis have been rocky as of late, she still feels that strange pull towards him. Not to mention the unexpected attraction to his wife. His wife who probably wants nothing to do with her now that she knows she can't have children.

It's Peggy's fault. She drew them into this. Even though Whitney has been brought to justice, it doesn’t change the fact that she's taken something away from the two of them that she can never give back.

Her heart sinks when the car pulls around the corner.

As expected, Ana and Mr. Jarvis chastise her for trying to leave. She tries to justify her actions, feels her words stumble on her tongue.

And then Ana has her by the shoulders, draws her into her arms. Peggy feels stiff and awkward for a moment before letting herself melt into the embrace. When they pull apart, Ana keeps a firm grip on her shoulders.

“Do you really have to go just now?” she asks.

Mr. Javis has gone with his wife’s luggage. Peggy feels vulnerable here, alone with Ana.

“I'm afraid so,” Peggy says, but she's feeling less and less sure as the minutes tick by. “My ticket is already booked.”

“Surely Mr. Stark can fix that for you.” Ana's smiling at her so sweetly. “At least stay another day. I'll have Mr. Javis make us dinner. Please, you've been working nonstop since you got here. Take a day to rest before you go home.”

The more Ana speaks, the more tempted Peggy becomes. She resists the urge to fidget under Ana's gentle gaze and feels her chest contracting. If she stays, she risks making their situation more complicated. But she _is_ exhausted and the prospect of spending the next six hours on a plane isn't very appealing.

“Alright.” The word leaves Peggy's lips with a sigh.

Ana's smile turns to a grin and she leans forward to press a kiss into Peggy's cheek. It's a platonic gesture, especially from another woman, but it sets Peggy's nerve endings on fire. She swallows and finds herself frozen as Ana turns away from her.

“Come along then, Ms. Carter!”

 

Howard Stark changes her flight. It's a little awkward to go back inside and see Jason again. Jason is a great man, but Peggy feels like the attraction to him was short lived. So many things have happened; it's hard for her to sort out her feelings.

But soon Jason and Howard leave for the new Stark Labs and Peggy finds herself in the company of Mr. and Mrs. Jarvis.

Alone.

In their bedroom.

Even though Ana says she’s much better, walking even, Mr. Jarvis insists that she take another day of bed rest. So there they are, Ana propped up in bed with Mr. Jarvis perched on the edge and Peggy in a chair. She feels small, as if they are ganging up on her, as if they had lured her here for something.

“Are you going to say something, Edwin, or shall I?”

Mr. Jarvis coughs into his hand and turns mildly pink. Peggy feels the mood of the room shift rapidly. Suddenly her stomach is in knots and her heart is thundering in her chest.

Ana tuts and shakes her head. “Really, dear, it's nothing to be ashamed of.” She turns to Peggy, her eyes bright. “I think Ms. Carter likes us too.”

Jarvis buries his head in his hands and makes a pathetic noise of mortification that Peggy resonates with on a deep level.

Peggy tilts her head, opens her mouth, wants Ana to clarify, but she’s forgotten how to make words.

“Am I wrong?”

“Yes, I mean, no, of course I...,” Peggy looks to Jarvis, desperate for some sort of help, but he's very determinedly not looking at her. “I'm not sure I understand.”

Ana reaches out, takes one of Peggy's hands that are folded in her lap. Peggy lets her, even though her heart is threatening to burst from her chest.

“Stay with us, Ms. Carter. It wouldn't be the same around here without you.”

The room is silent and Ana's holding her hand and Peggy still doesn't know how she feels about the irregularity of this situation.

“Ana, you're always so coy,” Jarvis moans. He's looking at them now, shoulders set and eyebrows furrowed. “I know this may seem strange to you, Ms. Carter, but, as Ana said, we both have...,” his voice trails off, he flushes deeper and Ana giggles. “Feelings for you. And we would very much like it if you were to stay.”

With her free hand, Ana coils her fingers with her husband's. “Well done, darling. That wasn't so hard, was it?”

Jarvis averts his eyes and mutters something under his breath but Peggy doesn't care to decipher it as her mind is reeling. Two people, two _married_ people have just told her their feelings for her. It is a situation she never one considered in her life. But here she is, with her closest friend and his wife who is so very gently running her thumb along the back of her hand....

“How does it work?” Peggy asks, feeling very foolish, like a child.

Ana squeezes her hand, leans forward in a way that draws Peggy in, almost unconsciously. “Does that mean you are willing to try?”

They lock eyes. Peggy wants to kiss her, but it feels strange with her husband in the room, with her husband still holding her hand. Her eyes dart to him for a moment and she fears he's not looking again, but he is. Their eyes meet and he gives her the tiniest of nods.

Peggy closes the gap between them. Her lips press against Ana's and the warmth spreads through her body. Ana is gentle, but confident. Peggy has never kissed a woman. It has crossed her mind more than once, but as nothing more than a fleeting fantasy.

When she pulls away, she feels the heat on her cheeks and all eyes on her. Peggy swallows and fidgets in place. Jarvis' hand closes around her shoulder and when she looks up he's close, too close.

Their kiss is hesitant, polite, little more than a peck that has Ana rolling her eyes when they part. “Really, Edwin, do you think _that_ is going to get her to stay?”

Jarvis clears his throat and Peggy laughs, surprising even herself. She squeezes Ana's hand and pitches forward. It feels good to laugh, to be here in this room with two people she admires. Two people she might admire more than she realizes. If she leaves now, she’ll never know what might have happened between the three of them.

But if something does happen between the three of them, what would that mean? Ana and Edwin are already married, what does that make Peggy?

Ana kisses her hand and Jarvis puts a gentle pressure on her shoulder. She’s thinking too much when all she really wants to do is climb into that bed with Ana and fall asleep between her and Jarvis. The thought alone nearly makes her sigh.

“I suppose they won’t miss me in New York if I were to stay a few more days…,” Peggy says slowly, watching as Ana breaks out into a wide smile.

“Oh, Ms. Carter, that’s wonderful!” Ana tugs on Peggy's hand, slips her free hand around her back of her neck to pull her down for another kiss. Ana is more daring, sucking her lip, sliding her tongue past Peggy's teeth. Peggy feels her body reacting before her mind does. She leans into it, releasing Ana's hands, moving forward, leaning over the bed, touching Ana's hair--

And then she remembers Jarvis is watching and breaks away abruptly.

“Don't stop on my account,” Jarvis mumbles, scrubbing the back of his neck.

“Honestly, you two,” Ana says fondly. She's still got a hold on Peggy, has her awkwardly hovering over the bed. She gently pulls her down next to her and Peggy complies. “Edwin, you too, dear. I suspect we'll all be more comfortable this way.”

The bed dips as Jarvis climbs into it and Ana wraps herself more firmly around Peggy, who still can’t believe this is happening. Ana kisses her in the crook of her neck and Peggy feels the sparks dance down her spine. And then Jarvis is there, hesitantly sliding an arm around the both of them.

Peggy leans into him, feeling slightly bolder. It's nice after so much action that she has a moment to rest. Her eyes flutter shut. She could fall asleep, just like this, leaning into Jarvis, with Ana's head resting on her chest.

And she does.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so this lead to a sex scene but I didn't want to randomly have smut in a fic I already rated and have to change the rating. SO! I will fix up the smut and post it separately later. Thanks so much for reading!


End file.
